Kid Germs
by Goover
Summary: Magic Kaitou fic Kaito is sick. Lime green jello booger men attack, Hakuba is covered in snot, Kaito talks funny, and its only chapter one! Wait till they decide to on a journy inside Kaito...


**Kid Germs**

**By: Goover**

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Kaitou's can get sick too...

Disclaimer: I don't own any of the Gosho group, or jello, or any big, shiny, expensive gems and such. But I do own a cactus who might make a later appearance! cheer

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**Chapter one: The Jello Booger Men from Somewhere!**

Kaito was sick.

That meant that night's heist was going to be interesting, to say the least.

Hakuba glanced over at him just in time to notice the magician getting ready to sneeze.

He did the only logical thing in a situation like that. He grabbed his binder, held it over his head, and ducked under the desk. Several other students had seen this coming, and had already reacted accordingly, Aoko among them.

"A...Ah... ACHOOO!" Kaito flew about five feet back, lime green boogers flying out of his nose as he went.

"Eww... Kaito, that's just nasty!" Aoko said with a grimace, wiping a bit of the green goo off her binder.

Kaito attempted a laugh that merely turned into a cough. "Id's onbly green dello..." he muttered.

But jello or no jello, it came from Kaito so it was treated with caution. That was good plan on everyone's part. The jello globs slowly formed arms and legs and began attacking students.

Aoko bravely fended them off with her mop while carrying on a nice pleasant argument with the stubborn teen on whether or not he should go home sick. Kaito, who was now a bit pale and slightly green, didn't have much in him for an argument, and Aoko can be very persuasive sometimes, so after a long ordeal lasting approximately one minute and eighteen seconds, the magician vanished in a puff of green smoke.

During this ordeal, the green jello people had taken nearly half the class hostage, built themselves fortresses out of bits of paper, staples, and pencil nubs, and were on the verge of creating their own language. Though the only person who witnessed this remarkable event was never seen again afterwards. Some say he joined the jello people, others say he was eaten alive, while still more believe he was only Akako's imaginary friend, Ralph, who ate people and had the corner desk to himself. No one every really saw him anyway.

"Tonight will definitely be interesting..." Hakuba said to himself, completely unaware of the jello stronghold being built over his right shoe.

The teacher hadn't noticed a single thing wrong his entire time.

It was rather cold that night. Not very cold, but cold enough that everyone's favorite blonde detective wore his famous Inverness Coat. (Nearly got one of those in Canada. There was a Deerstalker hat that matched. I was broke though. Still am. TT Sorry for the interruption)

The Kaitou Kid Task Force stood ready and waiting, Nakamori quietly cursing the Kid for being late.

Hakuba, being as time anal-retentive as he is, knew that the Kid would be there in exactly thirty-two seconds and counting. He knew that a certain classmate of his had a watch that ran thirty-two seconds slower then standard time.

He wondered for exactly eight seconds how that certain classmate's cold was doing. Then he puzzled for approximately fourteen seconds on how that may affect tonight's heist. And for precisely five seconds he considered the fact that this certain classmate may have his first ever no-show for a heist.

Then he began the countdown.

Five... Was that a flicker o white in the sky?

Four... No. I was a trick of the moonlight.

Three... Hakuba could have sworn he saw something move up on the roof.

Two... A cough? Probably just an officer.

One... Let the show begin.

As time anal-retentive Hakuba had figured, the Phantom Thief stood glowing white on the rooftop of the museum as he appeared out of nowhere. He seemed to be tinged a bit green around his face.

"Dadies and Dendleben!" he began as usual, but sounded as though he was holding his nose. "Does ambyone have a cough dwop?"

A few confused mutter rose from the crowd of officers. "Uh... I got one. Here! Catch!" The dim-witted cop threw him one. He wouldn't last to the end of the week.

The Kid bowed. "Dank you bery much, sir." He popped it in his mouth. "Da game isd dafood!" And with that, he dived off the roof and swung through the front door.

"Hey! Only detectives are allowed to say that!" Hakuba yelled as he chased after the ghostly Kaitou. "And shouldn't we have had that guarded?"

Once inside the dark building, Hakuba paused and listened.

Ah, here it was. A slight cough. Perfect. He headed in that direction.

The Kid seemed to have gone towards the jewel display, as he usually did now.

Hakuba flitted through the shadowy halls, he could hear a muffled sneeze. He was right. Jewels.

The Kid should be just about to grab whatever gem he was taking as the detective made it to the doorway.

So, it's no wonder he was surprised to find himself nose to nose with the thief. Never being very gifted with words, he shouted, "You there! Give that back, you great git!"

"What did you dust call be?" the Kid sputtered, obviously stunned.

"Oh come off it! I just called you a git!"

But it was too late. That was all the time the thief needed to escape past Hakuba and gleefully cackle his way down the hall. The sound reverberated around him mixing with the ever occasional hack or cough. Hakuba wasted no time in tearing right after him.

"Well, you are a great git! You git!" He yelled angrily at the bouncing white figure he was chasing after.

Then, one of those once in a lifetime, incredibly lucky, truly golden opportunities came about. And for once, it wasn't for Kaitou Kid.

Hakuba watched in utter amazement as the Kid tripped over his cape. He crashed to the floor, rolled over a few times, and then madly struggled to release himself as a grinning Hakuba waltzed ever-closer.

"Well, it seems thing are going my way for once, Kaito." Hakuba said triumphantly.

The Kid merely rolled his eyes as he struggled. "Ben are do doing do realize I ab DOT Kaido Kuroba, do dick dulled nid-wid?" Of course, these insults would have had greater effect if they didn't have so many D's in them from his stuffy dose, I mean, nose.

"Then who are you really?" Hakuba was clearly enjoying this. A lot.

But before the Phantom Thief could answer, a funny look crossed his face. He sniffed. "A... Ah... Ah... AAAAACHOOOOO!"

The resulting sneeze knocked Hakuba clear over and completely covered him with green goo. And it was really sticky green goo.

They both paused a second. Then, the silence was broken by an enormous bellowing laugh from the Kid and a stream of cusses from Hakuba that could have even out-classed Nakamori's vocabulary. The steam coming from the young detective's ears was quite impressive as well.

"Why, Hakuda-chan! I dever! Ad da color of dour face could oudshine a few of dose podice sirens! Well, id's been a real blasd, bud I'm donna be date for dinner if I don'd durry! Mum'll de furious if I do." With that, he waved goodbye and vanished in his normal cloud of pink smoke.

A rather large black pearl say on the ground were the Kid was, and it shined brightly in the dim light. "Bloody, rotten Kid... Always getting away from me... Say hi to mum for me, why don't you..." he grumbled as he got up, desperately trying to wipe the green jello off of him before it came to life. That is, if it WAS jello this time...

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Well, there's chapter one. I got this idea at... Midnight a few nights ago. No idea why, but the thought of a Kaitou Germ cracked me up.

Now wait till Doc Agasa and Conan get involved... evil laugh

Oh, and sorry for not updating for so long. ; I've been busy.

**Goover**


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